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This blog is now all about my personal life, including updates concerning Jerry's health. For quilt and pattern related posts please visit

Thursday, April 21, 2016

A lack of music is in the air

I received the aweetest email from a lady just now and it has prompted me to write a blog post.

I've been so busy in the quilt world, the other blog ( has been getting all my attention. I've been hosting quilt mystery sew alongs and they've been a big hit.
But, I would agree that it is time for an update on how things are going with us.


Jerry is really doing well with his liver. His MELD score is alsmost normal. Which means his liver  doing quite well. His Chrons is not behaving at the moment and he has some other issues but we have plenty of appointments coming up to try to keep an eye on those.

 He recently was able to travel and see his mother. We've been praying for two years now that he could and finally it happened.

His disability is still in limbo somewhere not getting approved.


Amy is 26 now and wishing to start a family of her own. She hopes to get married and buy a house this spring. She is the proud mommy of two fur babies that she spoils way too much. She still works for Hallmark and I have issues with Hallmark. They shut all their other plants down and expect their employees to work mandatory overtime all of the time. They've been told that in May, a mandatory 65 hours a week will be expected. I can't get her to quit...but I'm trying. I won't purchase Hallmark  cards. I used to work there as well. It's not the same anymore.


Seth is 18 and I really have no idea if he has any plans at all. Seth is Seth and I'm not sure of anymore than that. He's a good kid but his not ready to grow up.


Stephen..oh my sweet baby is 6. I hate it.
We don't get to see each other much so our time is precious. Tonight I read the sweetest email from someone who read a past blog post about Stephen and it had me in tears and prompted me to write this. I, of course, had to put Stephen in kindergarten, and with me working mostly evenings at the grocery store, I never see him! But I had to request those hours so that I could work the fabric job during the day. This week I don't even get a day off with him at all. I work both Saturday and Sunday at the grocery store. Tonight is a rare evening off and he begged to fall asleep in my lap " like he used to do." So, I let him. And there he sits putting my legs asleep because he's grown so big but I don't care. I'll sit here and write a blog post until I absolutely have to move him. But I don't want to.

I'm struggling with what to do with Stephen. He's asking to be homeschooled next year. There are pros and cons. We will see what summer brings. A couple of biggies:
1) just a year ago he LOVED music and sat down and taught himself the Imperial March ( Darth Vader) as well as the batman theme song on his keyboard. Now, a year later he hates music. Music class is his least favorite class at school. He says it's boring and wants nothing to do with music. MY BOY?! The child that played violin at age two and taught himself to play songs on his keyboard at age four? That is what school did for him music wise. Tonight was his spring concert at school, he didn't want to go. But he went and that was that.
If I homeschooled he would go back into Susuki music lessons eventually and find his love again. This is HUGE to me and the change in him breaks my heart. We even finally took down his keyboard just last night. Why keep it up? He has a nice one his grandmother bought him, but it's time we put it away until he returns to his music love again.
2) Seatwork. Stephen is just 6 years old. He attends school from 8:15-3:15 basically. Besides lunch and a snack right before he leaves, he gets one twenty minute recess a day. Not morning recess and afternoon recess. Not nap and quiet time. Nope. School. All. Stinking. Day. Now his teacher is great and I'm sure she finds ways to make it fun, but report after report I get from her ( including again tonight after the concert ), was that Stephen ' zones out ' and doesn't keep on track doing his seat work. Really? Hmmm... He's six. He's a boy, and he gets a pile of Seatwork to do every day. GO FIGURE!!.
Most of you reading this will have no understanding of those of us with the homeschool mindset. You just won't get it. But those that do understand know exactly where I am coming from. My son is smart and sweet and doesn't have this big bucket on his head that just needs junk poured into it. As a homeschooler we would learn by doing, touching, exploring, reading. Not siting at a desk with a like of papers to do.


Well lemme take a moment to explain where I am at :


Ms. Hillbilly is busy. No denying that. I work 5-6 shifts a week at a grocery store as a checker. I still design patterns and host quilt mysteries on the other blog. I still have my huge fabric group that is making a comeback in sales.

AND I am getting ready to market a whole bunch of new items that I will be making.

So. Yep. I'm busy. BUT-- the new items, should ' bring me home' so I can quit the grocery store . And I'll be traveling to quilt and craft shoes starting this fall. If Stephen is in school, Then that will mean I'll be leaving him for days to travel, and that does NOT sit well with me. But if he home schools, then no problem. Traveling will be a family affair with lots of learning stops along the way! And THAT my friends really excites me.

jerry has a Masters Degree in education. I'm fairly sure that much of the schoolwork can be handled by him. I'll just oversee it. We might try it for a month later in the summer and see how it goes. No hurt in a trial run.

And now, I must move my big little boy off my lap because my legs are numb. Excuse any typos here. I wrote this in the dark on my iPad.

And to the kind lady offering to purchase him a keyboard...thank you from the bottom of my heart. His grandmother did purchase him one. But maybe we can put our heads together and think of something musical to light his little fire again?
Let's wait til schools out and give him a break from it just a bit. I think by mid June he will be away from school, and back to his old self again rather quickly. I hope. What can I do to make him love sitting down at his keyboard again? I don't know the answer but I will find it.


Tami C said...

My shoes haven't been on for a couple of days! I wanted to let you know that I'll be saying an extra prayer each night for you and your family. I can't remember if I told you that my grandson's name is also Stephen. He was named after my brother who is also a Stephen. Your Stephen is sure to connect with music again this summer. Turn some great music on Mom!! (((Hugs))) Tami

Patty@inStitches said...

Tonya - I think home schooling is an excellent idea! At the time I was raising my kids it was not an option in this area, and all of mine found school boring. Now my grandkids are a different story - of the six, 4 attended charter schools, two of them graduating early, at age 16 and 17. Both of them have since graduated college. And the younger two are home schooled. The subject matter has improved and there is so much flexibility. especially when they can start working towards a field they are interested in at a younger age. Give it a try - I think you'll love it!

beaquilter said...

tough choice! I always thought the American school system is not set up for boys, in DK we had recess every 45 min every day all day up to high school, well by highschool the recess was every 2 hrs instead, but then longer, where earlier it was 5-10 min, but if that meant the boys would kick a ball around a bit or you just stood under a roof and shivered in the cold or rain, at least you were up and out.

Cathy said...

I am so with you on the home schooling thing. Our schools are failing our children. It’s no different here in Canada than where you are. The class sizes are too big, so they can’t get individual attention for all the many different learning styles. The teaching is done in a one size fits all mode, and it doesn’t work. To take a child of Stephen’s musical ability and put him into a class music session with other 6 year olds met have had him wondering what the sound was, since it certainly wouldn’t have been music the way he knows it. Unfortunately, you’ve had no choice in the past year but to do what you’ve done in order to survive. We homeschooled our daughter when she would have been in grade 4. She still wasn’t able to read at that time. During the year she was at home learning, she went from barely able to read, to reading the Narnia books. I was working at the time, 3-11 shifts. But because we were able to individually focus our time, we were able to get in all that needed to be done in the hours between 10 am to 2 pm, with 45 minutes off for lunch. It was by far the best thing we ever did for her. She went back to school the next year with a solid foundation. If there is any possible way you can get Stephen home, do it. You can fit his learning time around what you are doing. And while you’re at it, he’ll be learning how to run a small business, how to manage his time, and seeing all the wonderful things around him as you travel. What a fabulous way to learn geography! I will be praying for your new venture, as well as for your finiacial needs and Jerry’s disability and health.
It is so wonderful to hear that Jerry is doing better. Our God is indeed a God who answers prayer. You and your family will continue to be in my prayers.

Belinda said...

Hi Tonya,
Long time no write. I remember when my daughter was taking piano lessons. At first she was so excited, but the new wore off and she fell out of love with it. We made her continue, and had to prod and push her to practice. Eventually, she got back into it and is so happy she did. We struggled back and forth between love and hate for 10 years, but I'm sure she would tell you that she's glad we didn't let her quit. Little boys go through phases, as I'm sure I don't have to tell you. And some teachers are more encouraging and fun than others, so there could be something going on in his music class that rubs him the wrong way.

I sure hope that you are able to quit one of your jobs and get some much needed peace and time with Stephen. And I'm glad to hear Jerry is doing better!!

Carla said...

You've been on my mind a lot lately. After reading about the computer and always about dear Jerry and now sweet Stephen. I do hope the summer will give you time for the trial schooling and music once again enters.
Hugs and Prayers.

Pat said...

Glad to hear Jerry is improving with his liver, I hope it continues.
I wonder if you've made a decision on Stephen by now - sorry to have been away, since we moved there seems to be a million and one things to do!