to my readers

This blog is now all about my personal life, including updates concerning Jerry's health. For quilt and pattern related posts please visit HillbillyQuiltShop.blogspot.com

Saturday, October 20, 2012

New developments

I was just thinking the other day how I yearn to blog again. Make some new designs, get kits together, visit my blogland friends. But today, I just don't feel it. Today I just yearn for life to come full circle...we've been going round and round, you know? I just want to get back to how things used to be. And as long as things progress...I just don't care to type anything other than about my husband. So no more apologies for this not being much of a quilt blog anymore. Because all that matters is that right now my husband is lying in a hospital bed and I can't be there with him.

Perhaps I should fill in some details for you...

Last Wednesday Jerry attempted to go back to work. He made it a half day; and that did him in. He had another small stroke. Several in fact. His platelet count is high so today the newest concern is that there is a blood clot in his heart. Because of that they cannot give him blood thinners to stop the small strokes.

He also continues to have problems internally with his bowels, etc. No known cause as of yet.

While I have been concerned all along, today, my friends I am scared. Jerry is in isolation and my daughter is out of town so she cannot babysit Stephen. I am stuck at home, pacing, pacing, pacing. I cry sometimes too. My pastor has offered to watch Stephen for a bit today, but I doubt I will make Stephen take the long car trip for a short visit. I do have a friend coming tomorrow to watch Stephen then I can go be with my husband.

I think Jerry knew he was getting worse. Several days ago I was downstairs working on my fabric business and Jerry was lying in his bed. (Where he's been for 8 weeks now.) He sent me this text:

"No matter what happens in this life, I care about you more than anything. You will always be the love of my life. Forever."

Ditto husband. Ditto.



33 comments:

hope said...

Oh Tonya. My prayers are with you. Sending hugs. Hope

Teresa F. said...

I'll keep you and your husband in my prayers. Hang on my friend. Hopefully he will get better.
Hugs,
Teresa

Brynwood Needleworks said...

Dear Tonya:
There is nothing worse in this life than fearing for the health and well-being of a loved one. When it's your spouse, multiply times 10. I'll keep you and your family in my prayers, and ask that he return your husband to full health. I know He hears our requests. You're not alone.
xoxo
Donna

Donna F said...

Aww dear friend. Have faith & let God do his job. It's all in his hands anyway. It will turn out the way it's supposed to. I tell my DH that all the time when he's using all his energies worrying instead of being in the moment, here and now. I know your here & now is out of the norm, so you must focus on yourself, your children and your husband and do the things for them and yourself to get through. It will get better, after all, a roller coaster always stops at some point to let you off. (hugs)

Sunnybec said...

Oh Tonya I wish I could be there for you, even if it was just to give you a big hug my friend. I can only imagine what you are going through, my heart goes out to you. Big big (((hugs))) xxxxxxx

Ann Marie @ 16 Muddy Feet said...

oh man...........{{{HUGS}}}}

quiltmom said...

Tonya,
It is hard to do other things when the people we love are so ill- be kind to yourself and allow yourself the time to be in the moment. If it helps to write about it - then write - we all need to do the things that make a challenging situation more bearable- Sometimes I write so I can sort my thoughts out. I hope that your daughter returns soon and that your husband begins his recovery journey. In the meantime sending you warm positive thoughts.
Warmest regards,
Anna

Groovy Pumpkin said...

Tonya, I really don't know what to write, but here I am anyway. I really feel for you, and wish that things will improve for you all. I can feel your desperation, and there's not much I can do to help, but to send you (((hugs))) from me to you. You are a strong person, and I hope this strength stays with you for as long as you need it.

Jane xxxx

Groovy Pumpkin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
sandra said...

Oh tonya, I am thinking of you all. Hugs from me.

Christine M said...

Thinking of you Tonya, Jerry and your family and sending hugs. I wish I could do more to help. Christine xx

Sharon said...

Tonya, you and your family are in my prayers. (((HUGS)))

SeeingStars said...

Your family is in a prayer right now ... for comfort and peace and healing and strength. May Jesus help you to sense his loving presence especially now.

Vroomans' Quilts said...

Blessings surround you and your loved ones.

Marcia - Crafty Sewing and Quilting said...

Keeping you in my prayers.. sending positive thought to you and your family!

Carrie P. said...

Tonya, I can only imagine what you are going through. What a scary time for you. I am praying for God's peace and healing for your husband, In Jesus Name.

Snoodles said...

Tonya, I wish I could be there to hug you and just stay with you for support. I'm praying that God will reach down and heal Jerry so that His name can be glorified. Prayers and big hugs coming your way, my friend... Love you!

Dora, the Quilter said...

Jerry and you are in my prayers. Hard times are just hard, and even more so when the answers are so hard to come by!

Lynda said...

You and Jerry are both in my prayers too. Sometimes life is just so hard. I'll be thinking of you.

SewCalGal said...

Sending positive thoughts and prayers to you and Jerry both.

Big quilty hug too!

SewCalGal
www.sewcalgal.blogspot.com

Michelle said...

Oh Tonya I had tears in my eyes reading this post, I would be there in an instant if I could... Please know your husband is in my prayers as are you and your family.
Big Hugs from NZ

QuiltSue said...

All I can say is I'm so sorry, and am thinking of you all.

Dorian said...

My heart goes out to you Dear Tonya. Continued prayers for Jerry, you and family.

Angie said...

Sending hugs of light and healing and holding you close in my thoughts and prayers.

Pokey said...

I'm praying for comfort, peace, and answers for your both! Hold on, sweet girl ~
hugs and continuing prayers, pokey

Connie said...

You and your family are in my prayers Tonya.

Rhonda D. said...

Tonya, you and Jerry are in my prayers!!

Rhonda

KatieQ said...

Although I have great faith in the power of prayer, I wish there was a way I could be there to help you.

Patty said...

My heart breaks for you. You all are in my prayers.

Beth Beal said...

Tonya,

I have been following this off and on and I am so very sorry to hear that Jerry is back in the hospital. Please know that Jerry and you and you family are in my prayers.

Rhonda at Cobblestone Quilting said...

Praying for you and Jerry and the rest of your family, as well.

elliek said...

Power of prayer is awesome but the waiting for answers is so hard. Wish I was closer too but all I can do is send virtual hugs and many prayers.Jerry's text to you is beautiful.

Carla said...

While I haven't met you face to face I feel like I know you because of this blog. Technology.

My heart, hugs and prayers to you and yours.